I didn’t mean the blog to get all personal recently with a post to my mom, my boys and then myself. Here I am following up with one about my father. However, these are just my thoughts as of late and that’s why we have blogs, right? …to express what we’re thinking in a log format? Well, if it isn’t, please feel free to comment as to where else I should write it.
Anyway, this post today is dedicated to Mr. Yang Joo Na, a.k.a. my father.
I haven’t really had a good opportunity to get to know you. You don’t talk much about yourself. You sometimes talk to me when you have to tell me how I should be a better person or how I screwed up in life. You sometimes have talked about your family very briefly in the past, but I really don’t know much beyond the fact that you have sacrificed a big part of your life for the future of myself and Jim.
I don’t think I’ve known a harder worker and probably someone who is as strong or shall I say “Super” than you. You really are my Superman in my life. I don’t know of a single person in this world who with his two hands can build a 3 story living quarters in a warehouse without a building permit and no experience ever doing it before. On top of that, you lugged up a refrigerator and all sorts of other things. I wouldn’t be surprised if you carried up the 3 flights of stairs the big slab of cement that you and mom used for a bed for several years. I also, to be honest, was worried that maybe the whole structure would fall down or break down, but after I don’t know how many years, it still stood strong & it was because of you.
I don’t know a single person in this world who had stood up to two different people with guns in their hands threatening you. You have no fear in life or you really value a six pack of beer or a tank of gas more than your life. Regardless, you have no fear and for that, I have incredible admiration.
I don’t know many men who would go into their wive’s underwear drawer and walk out in the middle of the living room one Christmas holiday in her lingerie with your penis sticking out to make the family laugh. Maybe there are others in the world who do similar things, but your purpose was so angelic that I simply appreciate your thoughts.
I don’t know many men in the world who would leave their family in Washington state to go and live by himself in California doing all sorts of jobs for some stranger who needed your help as a handyman. I know it was lonely at that time and that it was a hard time in your life. I really appreciate you doing that for us.
I don’t know many men who would pick up and leave his home country and his family for the future of his children despite truly not wanting to do it himself. There are many days when I see how lonely you have been over the years without your close friends or family nearby. When your brother passed away this year, I felt bad you couldn’t see him go away. I am thankful you were able to see him before he did though. When your father and mother passed away, you didn’t have the ability to say “goodbye” the way you probably wanted. You haven’t been able to see your nieces and nephews grow up properly. You haven’t been able to share in the good times of your friends back in Korea. I know it’s been tough. I really appreciate you doing it though. I am lucky for your thoughts.
I know it wasn’t easy punishing us over the years, trying to tell us how to live life more properly, going to work in a foreign country that you didn’t want to speak it’s country’s language or live it’s traditions or doing many of the things you didn’t want to do just for our sake. I really appreciate it. I know I don’t show it every day, but I really do.
Anyway, this year, I’m also one week late in say “Happy Father’s Day” because it’s not celebrated in Korea & I didn’t realize it was last week. However, I hope you can forgive me like you have forgived me for many other things in my past.
I love you dad. You may not realize how much, but I do love you very much. I thank you for the many wonderful sacrifices you have made in your life on my brother’s and my behalf. You are an angel.